YORKSHIRE LASSES
By
Hannah Browton, Bella Marriott, Brooke Cattell and Felicity Killoway
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[Scene renumbering ctrl-# (ctrl-shift-3) on slugline to change]
- int. nail bar. day.
CHERYL, AMY, FRANKIE and STACY are all sat in the nail bar having their nails done.
nail technician
So what colours are you wanting?
amy
Just the usual (pause) so how’s you and Carl then?
cheryl
(Sighs) Don’t even get me started.
frankie
What’s up now?
cheryl
Well...
(whoosh SFX)
- Int. bedroom. night
CHERYL walks into her room to see CARL on her bed. Footsteps SFX.
cheryl
Oh Carl, you’re a good lad but I need a man.
carl
No please, I can change Cheryl, you’re the only lass I want to be with.
cheryl
Carl, please, just go (pause) make another girl happy.
carl
Is there someone else?
cheryl
No Carl, it’s not like that don’t be stup-
carl
No Cheryl I think it’s exactly like that.
Jeremy comes in the house the nose is heard from upstairs.
CARL
That’s him isn’t it?
CHERYL
No Carl, there’s no need for this
CARL
Give me one good reason not to break his face
CHERYL
He’s your brother
(whoosh SFX)
- int. nail bar. day.
Scene retuns to nail bar
frankie/amy/stacy
gASP
CHERYL
What?
STACY
You can’t get with a lads brother
CHERYL
I have ma reasons, anyway
(WHOOSH SFX)
Cuts back to the bedroom.
JEREMY
Babe you up here?
CHERYL
Yeah just a sec (she whispers) I’m so sorry
CARL
Oh Cheryl you really are a whore!
(Slapping SFX)
JEREMY
Babe you ok?
CHERYL
(WIMPERS) Yeah I’m alright
CARL
I think there’s something you need to see Jeremy
JEREMY
(Whispers) I know that voice.
(WHOOSH SFX)
Back at the nail bar.
FRANKIE
Oh Cheryl you do get yourself in shit sometimes
CHERYL
I can’t help that all the boys want me
AMY/STACY
(Imitating Cheryl’s voice) I can’t help that all the boys want me
FRANKIE
So what happened?
CHERYL
They both walked out on me.
(WOOSH SFX)
Cuts back to the bedroom.
CARL
How long has this been going on?
JEREMY
She said she was single
CARL
Well obviously not!
JEREMY
Just stay calm
CARL
My brother is getting with my bird, how do you expect me to stay calm?
JEREMY
I dunno, but let’s just settle this like adults.
CARL
Oh shut up moral high ground.
JEREMY
I just think.
CARL
I’m sick of you just thinking, with your qualifications and you thinking you’re better than me.
JEREMY
It’s obvious that you’re upset
CARL
You say one more word and I’ll nut yah.
CHERYL
Carl please stop.
CARL
You have no right to speak.
JEREMY
There’s no need to be rude
CARL
Right that’s it!
(Fighting noises)
Back at the nail bar.
CHERYL
Yeah so that’s what happened.
AMY
Don’t worry you’ll get another one in no time.
FRANKIE
Like you said all the guys want you
(All the girls laugh)
STACY
How about we go on a girlie night out?
FRANKIE
Oh my god yes!
CHERLY
Yeah pull all the lads!
AMY
Moving on a bit fast there Cheryl.
CHERYL
Well you can hardly talk.
AMY
What you on about?
CHERYL
Last time I heard, you slept with 3 guys in a week.
(FRANKIE, AMY and STACY LAUGH)
AMY
OI it was only one guy…(pause) I just slept with him 3 times.
STACY
So what’s going on with you and ‘im then?
AMY
Well…
(WHOOSH SFX)
- int. AMY’S HOUSE. NIGHT.
AMY and RYAN are sat in AMY’s bedroom.
AMY
Are you staying over, or going home later? I need to talk to you about something
RYAN
Well I’ve got my work clothes, (flirty tone) thought I could stay the night.
AMY
Right just so we’re clear (pause) this is not a relationship. But…
RYAN
Yeah, I know. I’ve actually been seeing someone else
AMY
Oh, who is she? (Pause) Actually I think you should leave
RYAN
But Amy this is what you wanted.
AMY
Don’t you tell me what I wanted! It’s complicated
RYAN
It’s been complicated for three months
AMY
Just trust me Ryan. You don’t understand
RYAN
Well then make me understand. Tell me what you want
(Silence) That’s what I thought
AMY
Ryan please
RYAN
No I’m sick of this, go find another fool
AMY
Ryan I’m…
RYAN
Spit it out then
AMY
Pregnant, I’m fucking pregnant (pause) and it’s yours if that wasn’t obvious.
(Big pause)
RYAN
Oh Amy
(WOOSH SFX)
Back to nail bar.
FRANKIE
Amy you being serious
STACY
Are you sure?
AMY
I checked 3 times (starts to cry)
CHERYL
You going to keep it?
STACY
Amy, it has fingernails. Think about the colors it could have.
AMY
This is not the time to quote juno
FRANKIE
But it’s a reyt film. (Slowly hearing Amy crying)
CHERYL
Guys this is really not the time.
AMY
I guess I’ll just have to keep it.
STACY
But what about Ryan?
(WOOSH SFX)
At Amy’s house.
RYAN
How long have you known?
AMY
I really don’t want to talk about it.
RYAN
Amy just tell me, don’t fuck about.
AMY
5 week’s
RYAN
I thought we used protection (Amy burst in to tears)
AMY
I dunno, it just happened.
RYAN
What are you going to do with it? (Silence) You know I’ll support you with whatever decision you make. (Further silence) you know that right? (More silence Amy sniffles) Amy please just say something.
AMY
Thank you
RYAN
So are you going to keep it?
AMY
I don’t know.
RYAN
Well it’s your decision.
AMY
Don’t put all the responsibility on me.
RYAN
It’s your fault that this has happened anyway.
AMY
How dare you. I didn’t force you.
RYAN
Whatever.
AMY
See we can’t even get our dysfunctional relationship to work, how do expect us to raise a child. It’ not like those stupid video games that you play. This is real life.
RYAN
Well I never asked for this.
(WOOSH SFX)
Back to nail bar.
CHERYL
How dare he say that?
AMY
I know, it’s fucked up.
FRANKIE
You can’t stay with him
AMY
But I think I love him.
Tune in next time to see if Amy keeps the baby.
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